Mouretsu Pirates 22: What.

What in blazes is going on with this show, even a miniskirt-wearing-high-schooler-pirate seems like space debris compared with the most recent revelation

Now, seriously. I have to talk about this.

For those of you (still) watching Mouretsu Pirates, who praised it for its hard-ish-fiction approach to sci fi (i.e. none of that G-particle phlebotinum stuff and robots that ignore the laws of physics) in the past 21 episodes and admired it for its unadorned and easygoing story, fear not.

Your expectations are all to be subverted. Now.
Warning: Spoilers ahead, if you care for that kind of thing.

If you can watch episode 22 and, at the end of it, not have your face contorted in that “is-that-truly-a-duck’s-penis” look, then you must’ve somehow missed to rest of the show.

Reference video below for your convenience.

Why do I say this? Because it came out of absolutely nowhere.

I have to say this. I have no choice. This is ridiculous. This is insane. This is the first time I have met a show that made me give a verbal deadpan “what” at the end of the episode.

And using only the last five minutes! I had one eyebrow in my hair and the other in my chin and that still doesn’t fully express the incredulity I had in those closing moments.

This is something I’d expect out of Gundam or Macross, not a slice-of-life space opera, for heavens’ sake.

This thing has more in common with Speed Racer than a spaceship

Firstly, we are introduced to some menacing group of space terrorists who hunt down piratekind for some unstated reason, and when we finally meet them their craft turns out to be some bastardised child of a Covenant battlecruiser and one of those plastic clip thingies you use to hold breadbags together.

Okay, that’s still fine, and the hundreds-of-lasers thing makes sense too, but then it starts glowing pink and flying around like a mosquito on crack. While spinning. Really fast. Like, Will-It-Blend? fast. This is still a fucking spaceship that is at least five hundred metres end to end. At this point, I waved a tearful goodbye to Newton and his merry friends, the Three Laws of Motion.

Hello, you may call me Captain Do-not-fucking-need-to-breathe

Then this guy appears and suddenly I’m thinking, “okay, which show did this guy come out from? Gundam? Macross? What is with that fugly mask?”Plus, he’s standing on top of his ship. In the fucking open. With no breathing apparatus, let alone a spacesuit. I don’t even want to bother mentioning that his ship just finished a freaking faster-than-light (FTL) jump that, last I heard, is one event you seriously need to be indoors for.

Oh, I’m still watching the show, alright. I’ve loved it up till now because it was realistic and fun and mostly harmless. But right about now, I’m thinking about taking that first quality and tossing it off the top of a skyscraper.

About Carillus

"Any sufficiently advanced application of locupletative language is indistinguishable from writing magic."
This entry was posted in Reviews and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Mouretsu Pirates 22: What.

  1. anonymous says:

    My thoughts exactly.

  2. Hogart says:

    A uttered my first”wat?” at the ridiculous ship doing strange dancing through space, then a second one when I saw Kotetsu/Tiger standing in space. I’d like to be able to say this show is charming in it’s utter stupidity, or clever on some parody-like level, but really they’ve just completely lost me since episode 18. I’m watching now just to see how far this train can be derailed in the name of being “Bodacious” or whatever.

    • Carillus says:

      At least I was still sustaining up until this episode, because most of the stuff was at the very least remotely plausible and realistic. This time was just really out of nowhere. But really, last straw breaks the camel’s back and all that.

  3. xyshtoph says:

    Teh masked dude is apparently hologram. Also, crew of Bentenmaru mentioned this plastic ship has some sort of new or different gravity control device. Now, (sorry, Newton), stretching it a bit, if they can change the gravity and as follows reduce mass of the spaceship to that of i.e. 1 electron, I guess it could go around like a cat set on fire.

    • Carillus says:

      Except that Newton’s Three Laws and gravity don’t have a lot to do with each other. A lot of people do make the misconception that gravity = mass and vice versa, but they don’t actually correlate. Basically, you can manipulate gravity all you want, but that doesn’t change the mass of an object. And if you don’t change an object’s mass, you kinda have to deal with Newton. You know, inertia and all that hefty physics stuff.

      Even if they could, of course, have instead used the term “mass control device” and made Einstein turn around in his grave instead of Newton, I still am finding it hard to come to terms with a spaceship larger than your local Wal-Mart (and its carpark) spazzing like some bugged AI script.

  4. mwnanamai says:

    That would have been better with actual pirates in miniskirt causing Mayhem than the random stupidity of a show who can barely mask its Moe component.

    By the way I came via de anime voting thingy, your blog look neat, might add it to my reading list.

    • Carillus says:

      I do agree, quite a bit of the overly moe elements didn’t really sit well with me either. Actually, make that most of the scenes involving Hakuoh Academy. I still remember how that one episode where they went pirating I chose to watch my wall instead.

      Please do stay for the read, new people are always welcome.

  5. r042 says:

    This whole final arc is a bit of a trainwreck from the laser firing space thing to sudden android doubles and a pretty unconvincing build up to a big fight that doesn’t suit the show. The justification is as weak as it can be too but oddly the best part (I do like bait and switch “this high tech setting is backwards compared to everyone else” stuff but this is poorly handled.)

Comments are closed.