A regular post heralding the advent of 2011.

Appropriate New Year-related caption.

Lame joke.  (No one laughs, include ‘LOL’ for safe measure.)

Hook.

Introduction.  (Continued from hook.) Disclaimer that author will not get all emotional and sappy.

Introduce fruitful events of 2010 in multiple paragraphs.

  1. Event one. Emotion.
  2. Event two. Emotion. Emo over random things no-one cares about.
  3. Event three. Lame joke. Emotion.
  4. Event four. Dry deadpan humour. Emotion.
  5. Event five. Long-winded reflection. Emotions.

Apology on non-anime-related post content. Excuse made up at point of writing. Promise to move on to anime-related events of 2010.

Start introduction for anime-related events.

  1. Event one. Include heaping amounts of unfunny sarcasm.
  2. Event two.
  3. Event three. Fanboy over everything. (For safe measure include LOL or ROFL or orz. )

Apology on anime section being shorter than Real Life section.

Unfunny joke about cotton candy.

Comment on dates in different timezones. Lame joke about time-travel and Back to the Future.

Long sappy paragraph about how author would have liked 2010 to go. Emotional reflection. Dry, bitter sentiment.  Apology for diverting back to real life content.

Closing paragraph. Include final reflections. Include tl;dr section at back just in case.

Typical New Year’s wishes for 2011. Wishes for self, in character and studies. Wish for more friends. Wishes for better anime and hoping Bill 156 doesn’t screw the anime industry completely. (Include link to self-written satirical article on Bill 156.)

Another unfunny joke about fireworks.

Wish readers Happy New Year.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 

 

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About Valence

I blog things.
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34 Responses to A regular post heralding the advent of 2011.

  1. Ming Xuan says:

    Typical reaction to a not so interesting post.
    Points out most people are on facebook again.
    Add in some awkward references that no one understands.
    Closes off with wishing people I do not know in real life a happy new year even though most do not care and only does so due to society norms.

    • Valence says:

      Feign interest.
      Agree with everything.
      Add in even more awkward references no one understands.
      Comment on how New Years have lost their spark, how they are no longer as ‘exciting’ as before.
      Close with wishing junior Happy New Year.

      • Ming Xuan says:

        Responds for the sake of responding.
        Add in long and seemingly profound words streaming them into an massive paragraph about humanity.
        Add in witty last liner.
        Add in P.S. which has no relations with above pseudo-paragraph.

        • Valence says:

          Pretend as though profound words made sense at all
          Respond with long essay on debating the values of good and evil in philosophy, from multiple viewpoints in history , from Xun Zi to subsequent after-war philosophers.
          Add in witty paragraph about how you just got one-upped, then describe whether you’re good or evil.
          Add in P.S. for not showing remorse.

  2. Ex14 says:

    Stare at blog post.
    Stare at comments.
    STARE. O_O

  3. Lectin Gaezat says:

    Laughs
    Imagines scene in brain
    Laughs some more
    Makes random comments for the sake of it
    Goes back to Facebook to stalk other people

    • Valence says:

      Smile.
      Think the words ‘Just as planned’.
      Tilt glasses.
      Laugh.
      Responds to random comment for the sake of it.
      Returns to being as bored as fuck.

  4. misterowl24 says:

    Think lolwut?! at the post.
    Confuse about the post.
    Don’t know what to say.
    End with Happy New Year.

  5. Baka-Raptor says:

    Short, self-aggrandizing comment.

  6. Ruby says:

    Laughs at the unquie post format
    Laughs some more at the comments
    Wishes Valence a Happy New Year ^_^

  7. kevo says:

    Congratulate author on a successful year.
    Make short remark about holidays.

    Notice that I would have savd tons of time blogging if I just typed up my outlines instead of drafting posts.
    Sad Face.

    • Valence says:

      Congratulate commentor back on successful year
      Make short remark about holidays

      Realize that for some reason outlines are entertaining too
      Smiley face.

  8. Justin says:

    Well, Happy New Year to you too! 🙂

  9. Azure Hoshizora says:

    *raise eyebrows* (ò_ô)
    WHUT…
    *reads comments*
    *LOL-s*

    Happy new Year too.

  10. Canne says:

    *applause* best New Year post so far!
    I am glad I didn’t fall into that format 😛
    Happy New Year!

  11. Mizorui says:

    Yoh happy new year Valence!

  12. hummerbob1 says:

    Reads typical new years post
    likes the format and laughs
    reads comments and laughs more
    tries to copy the format and fails
    ends up confused
    wishes you a happy new year 🙂

  13. kevo says:

    Posts dry reply in generic format.
    Takes it up a whole level.

    Trollfaec.

    • Valence says:

      Does not see aforementioned troll
      Posts witty response that actually doesn’t mean anything but takes hours to realize this fact

  14. Yi says:

    Reminds me of most of my 2010 posts. ^ ^

    Happy New Year!!

  15. Joe says:

    Response including internet acronym and animated smiley gif.
    Belated New Year greetings.

Comments are closed.